Resisting Divorce

“Don’t divorce!” “Mending the marriage is good for you and for your partner. Overcoming your problems will teach you how to prevent future problems in your marriage and with others. Facing your issues rather than running from them will provide insight about yourself, your needs, and areas where you need to improve. Elevating your communication and accommodating another will immediately improve your daily existence.”

Diane Medved has written a powerful book entitled Don’t Divorce: Powerful Arguments For Saving And Revitalizing Your Marriage.

This article in the National Review is a nice interview with Medved.

Lopez: How might we all start thinking differently about marriage and family, in the midst of all the political and cultural and personal challenges?
Medved: The reason divorce rates ascended was because of a sea change in national attitude fomented by spoiled Baby Boomers. The Greatest Generation’s motto was “Do your duty”: pulling and sacrificing together for the sake of the nation. This morphed into the Disney mantra of “Follow your heart,” meaning that if today you’re bored or “missing something” or feeling disrespected, you’re entitled to leave. We need to start discussing honoring commitment and ideals broader than those in our personal microcosms.

On another note:

“Two major studies assessed hundreds of thousands of married couples, asking their levels of marital happiness. Of the spouses who said they were unhappily married, five years later two-thirds in one study, and three-quarters in the other, reported being happily wed. And the couples who were most unhappy at first measurement became the most happy five years later. In other words, “this, too shall pass…”

I do think we all get trapped in the divorce mentality. Specifically, that once we consider divorce, it is too easy to slip down the rabbit-hole of “supporters” and “support groups” that help us along the way. In light of the research above, perhaps we need more people – including lawyers, therapists, and other family professionals – reminding us that weathering the sto